I have been reflecting on who I am and who I want to be. My life is full, raising seven children and doing all I do. The essence of who I am is at times lost in all that I do. I find myself defined by what I do rather than who I am. (Pretty deep thinking for a Sunday!)
Is depression what happens when I forget who I am and define myself by what I do?
The car journey to the shop each morning provides me with time to think and reflect. I have been thinking about kindness. What is it? and why do I think it is something essential to who I want to be and am.
The love of Wisdom
1. the study of the fundamental nature of knowledge, reality, and existence, especially when considered as an academic discipline. 2. a theory or attitude that acts as a guiding principle for behaviour. “don’t expect anything and you won’t be disappointed, that’s my philosophy”
I think kindness isn’t only the chocolate and flowers of life. It is also the steel, the backbone and frame that holds me accountable to being who I want to be.
Kindness can be telling someone the truth, especially when it is a hard truth to tell. I had someone tell me a truth about myself recently that was uncomfortable to hear. It was a truth I needed to hear. The truth being I can be rude and dismissive of others.
I can not change what I do not acknowledge
For me that is a hard truth to hear. I have a self image of being kind to others. Being rude and dismissive doesn’t fit that. I sat in what Frenchie would call my uncomfortableness. And I did my best to not dismiss the truth I had been told. Unless I acknowledge the truth from others I will never be the person I want to be. Accepting that at times I am rude and dismissive gives me the opportunity to change.
Being told a hard truth is a kindness. A kindness that is brave to do.
Being dismissive and rude, is me not being present with the person in front of me. Instead my head is full of all the other things I think I need to be doing. This is a behaviour I can change. I can focus on being a better listener and with the magic of the internet find the resources that will educate me to do that.
To the person who was brave and kind and told me a truth, thank you.
noun – the quality of being friendly, generous, and considerate.”he thanked them for their kindness and support”